Thursday, September 30, 2021

Today Is Thursday September 30 2021, This Is What Happen

 I bet you all want to know about Bart. Maybe an hour ago I talk to him and he sounded good. I'm so relieved and also a little anxious. 


I got a tote of brown fabric organized. Which at point don't have many of this color. There more than this one sheet. Let see I have anther full sheet, and then a couple on anther sheet.  The next color I will go though is grey. 


I saw few blogs and such from Asia and showed moon cakes. Well to me one I hardly and that should be in bold letters and with flashing lights. Our is nothing compare to yours. Plus there dry. I hardly buy them.

I guess this is good as anytime to talk about my saddle. We had a few horse when I grew up. I rode in local horse shows. It bought me joy, the horses did. But there things in my teen years was quite painful mainly emotional. I'm still waiting to see the therapist. 

Idaho and I'm guessing has shortage of therapist. The clinic I use has a behavior health for mental and emotional issues. They just hired on one guy who I should see sometime in very near future. I understand I would get called end of September or first part of October. If I don't hear anything by 6 or 7th of October I will call again. 

I have in my mind what I want to do for my next two pages for sketch book project in Brooklyn. But there one page I need to redo. Because of thickness. These sketchbook for Brooklyn Art library can't be over 1 inch in thickness.

Coffee is on and stay safe

Wednesday, September 29, 2021

Today Is Wednesday September 29 2021

 

My son Bart will be going into have his tumor remove from his brain tomorrow the 30th of September. I'm asking all to send positive and healing energy in what every form you choose to him and his wife Molly. 

Not much going on. I need to get my unhealthy habits back into check. Since I found out Bart got his tumor. I use food for coping. Haven't attend any overeaters anonymous for almost entire month. Last Monday I had plan to attend a zoom meeting.

Took Regis to Sandpoint and one of the places we went is to local library. And I want to get the dvd called FEMALE HUMAN ANIMAL although ROTTEN TOMATOES gave it higher score. It about Leonora Carrington who was artist during the surrealism time. Plus I was interested in couple of books and I'm fairly good at finding things in library. We had to learn the Dewey decimal way back when. Not even sure if they even still teach it.

I order bohemians tarot guide and anther tarot deck, surrealist style. After the first year I want to get my self some water color pencils, and been recommend inktense water colors by Derwent 

Coffee is on and stay safe

Sunday, September 26, 2021

Today Is Sunday September 26 2021, This Is What Happen


 Sunday is day I take three comment using a number generator to see which comments I will blog about. Last week I had total of 66 comments. There were a few days I didn't blog. Usually it seems like my Sunday post might be little long. No apology here. Last evening I got some fabric strips sewn together. So I will share the piece I got done. 

My first comment I will be using is from Betty of WOOD FAIRY the comment she left was "Glad you have seen your son and feeling positive, glad your throat is nothing life threating, looks interesting wrapping trees and prep for winter....It help lot seeing Bart. I won't say I'm not worried. But the visit is helping me deal with it. But once I start talking to the therapist and sort things out. I believe that will make difference in my life. As for trees there certain ones we try to keep the odds down for deer damage.  

Number two comment once again comes from YOGI his comment is " I hope you get help soon. I see Idaho and Oklahoma are like two worst state for covid. So we have something in common....I'm not sure the difference between emotional and mental issues. But my state of Idaho has one of highest suicide rate, we are 48% higher than the national average. I called a while back and recently see what going on with the therapist was to be line up with. So if I hear nothing by 6th of October, I will call and see what's happening. I will put a wager that also Oklahoma carried Trump. 

Number three comment and last one is from LOW CARB and here is her comment "I do hope you get appointment with your therapist soon" There not many place here that one can get help for any sort of emotional and or mental health. I know a guy who spend about three month in our local hospital looking for Psychiatrics unit in hospital ward. I'm not sure how the state mental ward works. I believe the close one is in Orofino. But what I found out that non baby boomer are less than other generation to see a therapist. Personal I have no issue of seeing one. 


It look like I was blogging about mental illness back in 2008 if I look a little harder I bet it was before that. I feel our spiritual, mental and emotional health is as important as our physical health. 

Right before I woke up this morning I had dream about "cleaning carpet"  well things were swept under the carpet in our family. Although not as many as I know. But it part of the baby boomer generation. Outside appearance was the norm. Two saying comes to mind when I think of carpet...SWEEP UNDER THE CARPET and also CALL IT ON CARPET. There issue from way back in my life has to do with both phases. Once I have understanding I will post them on my blog .Once week I lay out tarot cards and since it first weekend after Mabon (Fall equinox) I did more of intense lay out. Not going to cover it all. "Heart of Matter" I got the Magician he/she has tools to get though life. My therapist will be one of my tools to help me deal with things. "Immediate future" I got hermit and I need to look inside of me and work things out. Than the last card I want to share would be Ten of sword. Not a so called comfort card. I look at ten of swords as despair and festered. This card came under "This Is Out Come" the card was upside down and I know all 10 of swords isn't going to disappear with flick of switch.  


 Murphy took out standing portable air condition and we will by second one, before nest year heat comes around again. I wash down my western saddle and need to get some neatsfoot oil. I know tomorrow I have to take Regis to some of his appointment in Sandpoint. Plus there some other places we want to stop in. Not sure what I will happen the rest of week. It came to my mind that I haven't worked on my personal tarot cards. But I did find an SURREALIST TAROT deck. Not sure if I will get it or not. But what I'm hoping I can do my version of Pluto in Aquarius. 

Coffee is on and stay safe

Saturday, September 25, 2021

Today Is Saturday September 25 2021, This Is What Happen.

 It been Wednesday sine I posted I figure some of you need break from me. Plus it pretty much same ole crap. Hope this doesn't sound like a good bye cruel world. It not. I also need break from my thoughts. 

"A people that value it's privileges about it principles will soon loose both" 


Got tote of yellow fabric done. Made swatches out of them. If my calculation is spot on it. So far I have 7 pages of yellow. I know there more to do. It look like I have 2 more tote to work with. And I will see were and what needs to be done.

Yesterday Hubby and I went down to the doctor for my throat and it nodular. It super small and he couldn't feel any liquid in it. Ask me if I was expose to radiation for any length of time. I had to say "No" and he could fill in liquid in the nodular on my thyroid. So they do anther ultra sound in six months. He said it could been there for years. 

Well after since we were so close to Spokane. Bart drove over and meant us at Q'EMILIN PARK we visit about. Sure it still bother me that he has a tumor on his brain. I won't lie. The main thing that helps me push toward hope, is that he making steps for a positive out come. I can make steps also in positive way. But I did take quarter of tranquillizer. That way I knew I wouldn't of broke down and start to cry. I'm crying less. I mean lot less. Tranquillizer has there place, but I sure have no desire to use them on a regular time frame. It ok to take break from your issues or what tangle up in your mind. But to long break doesn't take the mental infection down, it could even fester more. Than we went over to BOB SEAFOOD and BURGERS the only thing I every had there is fish and chips. Well fries. So I gave Bart a hug and told him "I Love You" and "Good Luck With Surgery" His dad give him a hug and not sure if any word were exchange. But I feel better, known I told him I love you and good luck. I feel better seeing my son. It helped. 

Last Wednesday the 23rd my oldest turn 33. He just had a vasectomy. He said he sore. So both my son I guess did gentleman thing. So look like Murphy and I will only have little girls for grandchildren. Unless one of them adopted. 


Murphy and I did some home project or cooler weather preps. The northside of shed/garage roof was loose and we use liquid nail to hold down. I'm guessing around Wednesday or so, the brick will be taken down. Everything should be set up by then.

g

Start to wrap some of our trees. Mainly from deer rubs. There head and antler get itch. There still enough around to scratch on. 

Covidiots are doing fine here in North Idaho. Don't think one get their point across by OUT YELLING THOSE WHO DON"T AGREE WITH. People like this, is reason I still wear and N95. If I didn't believe in Karama. I might even wish there big toe would fall off. I even wonder if these covidiots could even pass HIGH SCOOL SCIENCE This is my community FACTS on covid and it the vaccine.

Time to go fold clothes.

Coffee is on and stay safe pol

Wednesday, September 22, 2021

Today Is Wednesday September 22 2021, This Is What Happen

 Usual Yesterday I talk about my health challenge and adventures. Although at this time I just keep my self under 205. I haven't really worked on loosing or keeping to a plan that is health. I just don't have it in me to go full bore ahead. I guess one would say I'm a modified version of getting fit. I gave my self permission. I know I will get moving forward in life once again. I'm not giving up.


Than on Wednesday, which is today I try to do some writing challenges. I will be doing NUMBER 28....which is "What is the best feeling in world" Not sure if it actually a feeling or not. But I have to say "Being Understood" although express one self can be awkward it doesn't matter what age you are. Than they're time we might not even understand our self. This is why I'm trying to line up a therapist to help me sort out and or understand my feelings and such. I know we will never understand totally understand other people. Simple reason is we don't listen totally to other and even our self. Sad things there time we get to busy with our own thoughts and such. If we took a few minutes to just shut up and listen. And try to understand the world wouldn't have as many hurt feelings.

Regis neighbor Edward hasn't been around and couple package been piling up on his door steps. So Liz had his number and gave him a call and found out he came down with covid. Ended up in hospital down in Kootenai County. As far as I know he wasn't connect to a ventilator. But he does have kidney dialysis 3 times a week. His sister and him thought this entire thing was hoax. She wore a mask because her employer required it. Nothing to serious Edward would see me out in store and sort of rib me about having a mask on. Nothing nasty or cruel. This is what got me. I know a few people thought because Mark blood was being process that the virus of any sort was being clean. So he had no worry about covid. 

To best of my knowledge Bart surgery happens the 30th of this month. I been hearing some people have trouble getting there medical needs meant. But than I hear things are getting meant. So one doesn't know what to believe. I don't take much trust what coming though on facebook. But still I like more people to take this virus seriously. Bart amazing and he will do what needs to be done. 


This is last little bit of eco dying. I'm going work on my fabrics and later on read some blogs. Plus I figure my version of Pluto going though Aquarius. I liked to get start before end of the month. 

Tuesday, September 21, 2021

Today Is Tuesday September 21 2021, This Is What Happen

The weather been fantastic and listen to Biden speech or part of it. As he was address the U.N. 

Morning been some what struggle. This morning wasn't as bad as a lot of mornings. But still I have to push my self though my life. This morning even if the lawn had dew on it and got my shoes wet. I walked around the place and soaked in the sun. 


I got some blue strips cut for the up coming quilt. I can't tell you exactly how long I been working on it. I know it been sometime. Color blue seems fairly easy to come by. 

Quenella and I had out morning coffee and I got my self a muffin. In colder months we won't be meeting. I might go out to her place once month for a visit. She thought of meeting in car, but I wasn't into it. Like in my POST yesterday. Under the Sun as well as other business here, they don't take covid seriously. 

Quenella got a journal about grieving and she said she wasn't into journal. Confession time....I was supervise how much I like journal/blogging. I guess they might be local grieving group though Lutheran church and she planning to donated to them. I might of done a few journal pages when I was in school. But I under stand journaling start to go more after I was out of high school. When I grew up a little expression of anything mostly emotions wasn't part of my generation. We learn or was expect to suppress them. Sooner or later some kind of trigger brings them back to top.

Interesting day at work. Both my client Liz and Regis doesn't have what I would say good "Coping skills" not saying mine is top notch. But earlier Liz and her son Cyrus got into this spat. Couldn't make heads or tails of it. Anyhow I really wasn't try or even wanted to. Cyrus was on lunch and went back to work. I thought she was talking to her therapist and she came out of the back room and was staggering about and pass out. Regis and I got her up the couch, she was dead weight pretty much. Been though this before. So took Regis to the store and found out she called her social worker up. Or was it the other way. Not sure on that. But found out she took anywhere from 10 to 15 Benzodiazepines. The medics was called and of course the police comes. She semi came around and agree to let medic look her over and her vitals was in a good range. So they asked if she want to go to hospital or not. She refuse. I don't think she want to deal with the issue between Cyrus and her. So she want  to blank out as quick as possible. Honestly I'm sure she didn't want to end her life. One thing I don't understand how the doctor rights out prescription for them and knows she drinks. I know they only give small quantity. 



Here some eco printing I did on paper. Maybe before Sunday I can explain how I did eco printing.

Coffee is on and stay safe


Monday, September 20, 2021

Today Is Monday September 20 2021, This Is What Happen

 


For first time I did some eco dying of fabric. I thought I would post some photo. I consider my first round trail and error. 


I haven't heard from therapist, so I called and to find out what is going on. Well they got me on list to see this one therapist, who is new hire. He hasn't been there for month and only has a small case load, so he can get use to the paper work. So it sound like I will be seeing him in one or two weeks. And their anther therapist coming on board in October. The lady who schedule behavior health ask me if I was going harm my self and my answer was no. But I told  her the morning was the most difficult for me. I couldn't come up with word in morning how feel, tell I got off the phone. The word would be "Hallow" 

  

Just general stuff at work. Found a table on main street in Bonners Ferry. Ate my lunch and read a few pages but had trouble keeping focus. The hospital doctor wrote a LETTER TO PAPER and still people in my area thinks the plaque is a hoax. As of 17th they're is 208 active cases here. But we're a low population area. Still my community haven't made third on vaccinations. Still low amount people where mask. I had to go into grocery store. But I don't get people who wear mask around there chin. I saw two adult female walking in store, with mask down around there chin. Usual you don't see many like that. They had smug look on there face. Question time...what statement our these people trying to make? Qunella and I will be meeting for our morning coffee tomorrow. We get our coffee and treat at Under The Sun, head out to and outdoor table. Once the weather start to cool down. We won't be meeting weekly. Usual the majority at under the sun aren't masked and no plexiglass. So we will discuss cooler weather plans. Until the snow flies we could possible meet once month at each other places. Qunella and I been both vaccinated.

Coffee is on and stay safe   


Sunday, September 19, 2021

Today Is Sunday September 19 2021, This Is What Happen

 Sunday is usually the day I take three comments and expand on them. My first one or lucky one came from Australia. It seem I connect with lot of "Ozzy" So RIVER wrote this...I think your mind will be much easier when Bart operation is over. My mum would of been 96 now if she lived. In all honesty I want Bart operation to be over. But I know lot people are praying and sending positive love, strength, and energy. I do apparated this very much. Sawyer Bart brother who two and half years older. In his simple words of "Bart will be ok" The first time around Bart had tumor remove it didn't seem to bother me as much. But the second one is. Although I keep push forward. Lot of people in my family lived into there 90's I now have two Aunts who are in their 90's.   

Liz over at LAW OF GRAVITY wrote this  comment on my blog....When my mind is racing. I have drops that helps me chill me out a little. Sometime you need a little help to get back to calm. Definitely see Bart. I have left my car lights on a couple of times. Not fun the dead battery.....My mind seem to be more balance. Or my depression and or anxiety don't last as long. But there still time I do have my episodes. The Lexapro is keeping the depression or anxiety to more manageable level so I can function. Not having car does bring problems

My last comment I will be sharing is from YOGI...I have some distant relatives living in Bonners Ferry. I guess they like it as they been there for a long time....In the 20's and 30's quite few people left dust bowl area of country and came up here. And now people who retire with there big pension on coast is coming here now. But it doesn't help the people who was foolish enough to stay here and try to make living. Most people I know who stayed in area and work lot of there retirement is under 1,200 a month. But those who moved in from other place there retirement is over 1,200 month. But not many came claim to be born in Bonners Ferry. If Yogi distant relative been here I might know the family.


Got some fabic press and during the week I hope to put it in they're correct container. I will start green on left, only one piece. Than continue though until yellow. At very end. I don't think this week I will get any sewing done on 2 inch block quilt. I been working on. But following week they're a good chance I will do some stitching. I try my hand at eco dying fabric and paper. The first round went ok. But there still a learning curve. I will be glad to show the eco dying after it dried. Work this week. I think the only place I have someone for appointment is Regis at physical theory and cognitive. Than my self to a throat doctor on Friday down in Postfall I have some type of nodular on my thyroid. They will be looking at. Planning to meet Bart and his gang in Courd'Alene area.  Oh and in morning which is Monday I will call the lady at KANISKU and try to get hold of person who head of behavior health. . And see what going on. I never got called last week, like I thought I would. 

Going to watch PBS Ken Burn MUHAMMED ALI. MY father didn't care for him. My father had quite a few prejudice. Change was difficult for him. As I understand lot of changes happen in his life wasn't necessary for the best. I wish I could remember the quote he use for Muhammed Ali. But before my dad pass away his heart soft for negros.

Coffee is on and stay safe


Saturday, September 18, 2021

Today Is Saturday September 18 2021, This Is What Happen

 Morning isn't as rough for me. But I wonder when I will either drop into depressive or anxiety stage. I know none of you can really do anything about it. I know I will get though it. Still planning to see a therapist, but finding one can be frustrating. But I'm willing to go down to Sandpoint to see one. I only know of 2 places in my community offers counseling and there well over 30 down in Sandpoint. 

I like to take a paragraph space and tell you about the black market. When I mention black market in YESTERDAY post, I'm not talking about meeting someone in back ally, with pass words and such. Most people I've taking care of got under $900 monthly and majority of them actual receives $771 month as a single person or for couple $1,191. I never took care of couple, which both was on disability.  So quite a few when they go to doctor and they exaggerate their condition. So in hope the doctor will write out prescription for more than they need or stronger dose. So usually they sale up to third of there pills. And extra $20 or so for these people comes in handy. I've mention it to other profession that is connected with the selling of part of medication. And they also turn a blind eye. Like I said an extra $20 makes the different if they will eat last few days of the month.  

Couldn't tell you how long I been working on my sketch book project for BROOKLYN ART LIBRARY. This is how I see generational planted of Pluto going though Capricorn. At this time Capricorn is going though Pluto, it came in November of 2008 and will leave in January 2024. Less than 6 months. Also during the American Revolution was Pluto was going though Capricorn. In nut shell Pluto going though Capricorn is about "Building a Better World" You may think of these words to describe this planet line up. Overhaul, Heavy, Forceful, Purposeful, and Freeing. These people were born as Capricorn going though Pluto. SAMANTHA POWERSJANE AUSTENANN RADCLIFF Some comes easy for me. I know what going to do for Pluto going though Aquarius. Not clue what I will be doing as Pieces going though Pluto. I should be here as Aquarius. I should see the first part of Pieces in Pluto, and I will be in my 80's

I've never been much interesting in mind of like serial killers. But I do have interested in mind of artist. The mean behind art. I can look at art for long period of time. Trying to figure what the art piece means.

We harvest most of garden, most we gave to the neighbors. They have 6 mouths to feed. Look like it might rain all weekend. 

Coffee is on and stay safe


Friday, September 17, 2021

Today Is Friday September 17 2021, This Is What Happen

 Let just start with me. I'm getting tired of being in this funk. I even have a hard time tolerating my self in last few weeks. But when I fall into a funk. I keep telling my self you been pulling your self out of slump. Some how I mange to it, each day.

This afternoon I slip into depressive slump, and had to excuse my self from work. I went home and took tranquillizer which came off the black market. They do have there place. But it just blanks out your thoughts and you don't deal with the issue at hand. But I need a break. My doctor did offer me tranquillizer and I refuse them and now I'm wondering if I should of gotten them. She was going to write the prescription as a PRN anther word as needed.

I didn't hear from the therapist today. Had plan to  call shortly after three this afternoon. But once I even took a half of pill I have hard time functioning. I didn't want to call and make poor excuse as person. By slurring my words together. But I had to leave my thoughts and need an escape from them. I will call Monday morning and see what is going on. I think or believe some of my issues was my father death. That needs and should be resolved. Although I'm not sure even where to start. But the therapist should be able to help me sort it out.  

So I'm going to try to go up to Liz Saturday for 2 or 3 hours. I will do light pick up and wash some whites. I told her I will bring up an art project I'm working on. I'm having trouble drawing and open book. I hope Liz will give me some pointer. Can't get my page curve right.

I need to catch up on my paper work.  

Thursday, September 16, 2021

Today Is Thursday September 16 2021, This Is What Happen

 Today would of been my mother 98 birthday if she was still alive. 

Still my mind is in either one of these 4 places or maybe stages would be better term. Racing thoughts, depressing thoughts, blank mind, and normal mind. I did say normal. I couldn't say which one of these four will pop in. But last evening (Wednesday) my mind was total blank. I know no one mind is total blank. Most of day I would have to say most of the day I feel my mind was normal. But on way home I felt depress some what. And as I type this my mind is on racing thoughts, although it been more accelerated out. I haven't yet heard from the place where I will be seeing the therapist yet. They hired on new guy and I'm to be called this week. Well there one more day left in week, so if I don't hear from them by tomorrow by three. I will call and see what going on. 

Both Murphy and I would like go down on weekend day to see Bart, before his operation. 

Work been going ok. Did Laundry at both places today. And took Regis to his appointment and part of time I read book about letters between Virginia Woolf and Vita West. 

And yesterday when I came home from work, I left the lights on my cat and had dead battery this morning. 

I only did half of my exercise today and I don't want to wait to late to do them. So this is good time to do them.

Coffee is on and stay safe   

Wednesday, September 15, 2021

Today Is Wednesday September 15 2021, This Is What Happen

 

Going to give 1 of the 37 writing prompts a try. I'm pushing my self though it. And I will attempt to do NUMBER 14 "What do you like best about living in our city" 

Don't think I would use term "Our City" no I would use term "My City" now. My mail comes to Naples Idaho. But most of my business and such is done in BONNERS FERRY I would say it divide into three area, the southside, northside, and downtown. Our town don't have many chain store in our area. Well there some advantage and not so advantage on this. I believe the only thing is a chain store is our super market and gas stations. We have no chain as a fast food place. Down town has some beautiful brick building and our down town is basically two and half blocks by two and half blocks in size. And town don't have parking meters since like the early 80's. We have some unique shops. Let me see if I can like the ones I try to support and browse though. Three antique shops THREE MILE ANTIQUE main thing I get out of there is fabric. SELKIRK NORTHERN TREASURE I bought couple of Christmas gifts and doll there. The other place is called this "OLD TRUNK" can't web site for them. Regis bought ROCK EM SOCKUM. Main thing I got out of there is more fabric. I have several time had my eye on some of there hand bag. Than down town I like to go into UNDER THE SUN AND SOUL SHINE as you know I have coffee and treat on Tuesday with Qunella. I do by items out of there. And catty corner is our lovely book store, Bonners Book. I think most people calls it JOHNS. The guy who owns is name "Johns" And we have two fabric store I go into is Callie Niche and couldn't find a web site and the other fabric store is LITTLE COMFORT QUILTING But I heard there a fabric store across the bridge on North Side of town, haven't check it out yet. I'm a thrift store shopping and our town has two COMMUNITY THRIFT and SECOND CHANCE I usually try to donate and shop more at Second Chance than Community Thrift, although nothing wrong with either one of them. All stores are wonderful and there only one store I won't support in my community. 
Unless you bring up politics and or religion people here is friendly. Mask wearing isn't popular I only once had issue from non mask wearer, although nothing I couldn't handle. I wish thing was little more tip to the liberal side. And my other complaint that things change as one leg snail pace.

 Look like we're having rain over the weekend. I did get a walk in this morning. 

Coffee is on and stay safe

Tuesday, September 14, 2021

Today Is Tuesday September 14 2021, This Is What Happening

 Morning seem to be the hardest, for me. My emotions are every way but loose. All over the place. When I wake up and still in bed. I don't want to get out of bed and face roller coaster ride in my head. But I know after a bit it will settle down. 

I'm still trying to take care of my self. At time I have push my way though. I have change to get anther client. But at time I just can't handle any more of a load. So I will go over and tell her what going on with my son. And try to a lease line her up with anther care giver.   

I've start back doing my exercise and walking routine. On even days I do exercises and than odd days I take a walk. If it rain I go on treadmill.  

I was about not to talk about "Well Being" And I might not be top notch at this time. But hiding and not dealing with things, isn't be "resilient" so that my word "resilient" At this time I need some professional help to find my strength. And help me figure out my emotions. 

In my overeaters anonymous workbook. I will be sharing this question from the book "What did these action cost me? Fat, and both health and emotional issues.

I start to get my supplies line up for anther page for the Brooklyn Sketch Library. I need to figure and practice on how to draw and open book. Had coffee with Lalita and Qunella, at Under the sun. Found out Lalita hasn't gotten the vaccine and at this point I don't think she will. She thinks there is stuff in shot, that the government isn't telling us. Found out her oldest Grandson had covid and was on ventilator for about two weeks, and now is a long hauler. My area isn't the fashion capital of world. Most people I would say dresses causal. But once in while you will see someone stepping out of box of small town. One lady came out of Under The Sun with animal print one piece outfit. Hair dyed silver grey and wearing shot cut boots. Quenella start to giggle about the lady dress. I thought it was awsome, that someone had the guts to step out of the box. Quenella every since I know her pretty much wore the same thing. Her fashion is hippy type skirt and white blouse. Same hair style also since I known her and simple braid down her back. I'm pretty sure her braid doesn't make it to the back of her bra. People walking around today I saw more people with there "face diaper" on. That what some people around here calls the covid mask.  

Coffee is on and stay safe    

Monday, September 13, 2021

Today Is Monday September 13 2021, This Is What Happen

 Usual On Monday I do a garden type of post. Well hopeful I can few items in about the garden. I been leaves on tree turn colors.

I don't see this being long post. I checked in with my doctor this morning and to see if they any physical side effects with low doze of Lexapro. I have plenty of emotional that I'm having trouble processing. I'm getting line up with therapist this week. To sort things out. I only been on 10 mg of Lexapro since Friday, and we don't think I been on long enough to give give fair about time, see if it doing the job. So she prescribe the 20mg and told me to wait about two weeks to see how I'm doing. Which would be 24 this month. If I feel things are in more of balance on 10mg. I will cut 20's in half. She also brought up possible tranquilizer such as valium as PRN take as needed. Well basically it numbs the thought process and it stifle what one needs to deal with. See, I'm having issue of dealing with Bart brain tumor. So doctor and I thought after I see therapist for a while and it can be brought up again. 

News is on.

Coffee is on and stay safe 

Sunday, September 12, 2021

Today Is Sunday September 12 2021, This Is What Happen

 Got load going in washing machine. Washing some rug, computer case, and quilt that cats was using. Oh and towels for my car seat. So I thought I would post a blog or lease start one. This is the day I go back though comments and in past step back in blog. Yesterday most of my blogging pals mention something in there blog about 9/11, which happen in 2001. I wasn't even blogging back than, I had plan to go back to 2000, and see what was going on. Neither one of my son was even in High School. Going to Step back to 2016. I didn't post on the 11th, but I did on the 12th Which is five years ago. Are local fair was going on and no covid to speak of. Haven't been to our local fair for last two years. Wish more people in our community would take this virus to heart. I will continue to do my part; void crowds, be vaccinated, wear a mask, and work on my attitude. Look our garden was doing great and got my new sewing machine. After I retire and or during my cutting back in hours. I can be more creative. The bloggers who left comment that day, still blog except one of them. I think lot bloggers eventually migrated over to facebook. I try to stay low on facebook, way to my angry and hateful people there. I stop in this morning and wish two people a Happy Birthday and that will be it, for today.

I really like George W Bush speech he gave at Shanksville Pennysalvina, about terrorist...."There is little cultural overlap between violent extremists abroad and violent extremists at home," he said. "But in their disdain for pluralism, in their disregard for human life, in their determination to defile national symbols, they are children of the same foul spirit."....Opinion time....They're nothing parotitic about terrorist, doesn't matter where it from and or the people who is committing the act.  TIMOTHY MCVEIGH was a home grown terrorist and others. 

This is good enough time to take step back though this week, and visit three comments was left on my blog. I give my thoughts on them.

My first comment I will be using is from Cynthia and her blog is called LIFE IN MERLIN and on September 7 she left this comment..."Hope you sore throat is just that and nothing more. Thinking of all vacations my husband and I and our girls received over the years with out even thinking about them, we took them, we all stayed healthy, end of story. Just can't understand them....I had my shots and I barely recall polio. My mom went March of Dimes drives. My sons was fully vaccinated. But some time those who come up with conspiracy theory, just real gets to me. I been watch WORLD CHANNEL  over on you tube, about conspiracy thinking.

Second comment will be from LOW CARB DIABETIC and her comment was "Was sending you healing thoughts and good wishes"...Thank you. I'm doing a lot better.

Third comment will be from DRIFTING THOUGH LIFE and her comment was "P.S. hope the test is negative"...It was. But I want to make sure. I'm pretty careful when comes to covid. But like past post, not third of our community is fully vaccinated.

POPULAR LOCAL dies of covid. He did local auction and was social gathering place for many local. I known people who went out there for many years. A local lady who been going out there for ages and said he didn't look well. My guess and I don't think I'm off much. Hardly any people had mask on. The local auction is place I want to see what is going on. But never made it. And no way I was go to gathering of bunch on maskles and unvax people. 

I went into town and get my paper work, and did some other errands. The local store had rock fish on sale for $3.98 pound. I wasn't going give a mask count, until this LETTER TO THE EDITOR on face diaper. The store was pretty full and 2 of the employees had face diapers on. All so 2 other people and I had our face diaper on. 

Hubby and I got one window trim put on. Sunday is day I got out my EARTH MAGIC ORACLE CARDS and pulled out Love card "All wounds stem from the illusion of separation from Source and all of Creation.  The route to healing this wound is through cultivating love and compassion for every being on this planet, including yourself." Later on I will do my tarot reading. 

Coffee is on and stay safe. 



Saturday, September 11, 2021

Today Is Saturday September 11 2021, This Is What Happen

 

Finely got my COUSIN art work hung up in my dinning room. It a print, but I love it. I know people both friends and family who would of remove the popcorn maker, tupperware container, and frypan. We hardly use that frying pan. It needs to go some place else. 

A close up. There reflection off the art piece. I didn't want to remove it from frame. She or who ever does framing does a great job. I know I don't have skill to get back as I got it.

Can't believe it been 20 years since 9/11. At first when happen. I thought my sons but some movie in VHS player and was telling me, we were getting attack. In a very short time, I know it was true. Our world change, but it always changing. All though history we had event that change us. It sad we need or seem we need a brutal event to wake some people up. Which makes me sad and angry. 

Pretty quite day, and I sometime put off my blogging in hoping something would happen. Than I think I'm bless my life quite uneventful. Boring should be top of all of list at times. Did some decluttering Got all my handbags hung up. And help hubby put on the scaffold on back of the pick up. The window trim need to go on back windows. 




Here two event in my community. I would be interesting in attending. But as many know we have small percentage of people who are vaccinated and  general thinking in my community the virus is hoax and all sort of nonsense. Which I'm not going to waste my time blogging about it. Like I mention that Liz only has one working lung, and I would feel horrible if I was culprit that gave her covid and or anyone else.  I doubt I could name 12 people in my county that gotten the vaccine. Glad I got projects to keep my self busy.

Coffee is and stay safe

Friday, September 10, 2021

Today Is Friday September 10 2021, This Is What Happen

 I went back on LEXAPRO. I took this back in 2006. I was diagnose with P.P.D (Persistent Depressive Disorder). Not serious case, no thoughts of self harm or suicide. Also some mange to function thought out the day. It takes a few days to get my mind and body use to Lexapro. Back then I was first start on PAXIL and I had non stop headaches, for like two to three weeks. Can't recall which one I was put on next. It was either Lexapro or ZOLOFT. Although one of them I end up gaining 60 pounds. But no headaches. Doctor ask me if I agree with the therapist diagnose. I told her I thought Anxiety was more of issue or me.  So I googled "Chronic Anxiety" and came up with G.A.D. Although never came to point I could maintain and get though the day. So Monday morning  I check in with doctor and see how things are going. 

One thing I need is pair of winter P.Js the pant pretty much falls off. Or possible I'm wearing rapper P.Js. Did plan to go with Quenella down to Sandpoint on the 14th. Me being under the weather, plans did shift somewhat. Maybe more toward end of month or first part of next month. 

I been playing around about buying COMPLETE WORK FRIDA KAHLO, although I never spend that kind of money on book. I went into our local book store, and I like supporting home town business when possible. He can get for more at $187. $7.00 less on amazon, and I have hunch he getting off of Amazon. But that ok. Well like I say "Still On Fence"

I press more fabrics, one of is pretty wrinkly. And couldn't get wrinkle press out. What is going happen is I'm going have to damp to good spin dry out of washing machine. Than try ironing it again. I want to try some ECO PRINTING. At this point I got fabric and paper mordant. Depends on weather I hope to gather some nature beauty. I been watching the QUILT SHOW on organizing and colors. 

Coffee is on and stay safe



Thursday, September 09, 2021

Today is Thursday September 9 2021, This Is What Happen

 Life seems not to go at pace I want or need it to. In all honestly I plan to have completed my sketch book project. "Pluto going though 12 Zodiac Sign" My view of history and generation blessing and or curse. 



This is Sagittarius going though Pluto. Which at this it time to call out social issue(s). My social issue "The United States Medical System" Question time...What issue would you like to speak up about? I do have other issue I would also speak loudly for or against.  When Pluto going though Capricorn is how to solve such or any issue. Confession time...It bother me when politicians complain what wrong but offer no solution to issue. I lease offer and ideal. How I think the medical system or a one payer system should work. Doesn't matter the income no one should receive free medical care. We all should pay 1 to 3% of our income, including  those who on retirement pension. Not sure who would pay at what percentage. But than I believe that we all should take some responsibility in our health choices. If we make health choice and live a healthy life style. Possible a cash medical stimulus at end of year. I know there kinks in my ideal. Statement time...It doesn't take much to be totally ruin by medical bill here in United States.


Still embroidering on the 3rd of 12 blocks quilt for Claudia. Lot time during the news I will stitch a bit. All of my Granddaughter will get twin size sampler block quilt. Hopefully before they all graduate from High School. 

Went back to work and quickly ran up and got Turkey Sandwich from the BREAD BASKET. Certain place I get it to go and other place I will dine in. It all how it set up. This place done nothing to protect their staff or patrons. It one local business own by a ANABAPTISM. I guess some of branches believe in vaccination and other don't. There going to better place when it all done and said. We have family next door and you couldn't ask for better neighbors. I took my sandwich done to the park and ate it.

Coffee is on and stay safe 


Wednesday, September 08, 2021

Today Is Wednesday September 8 2021, This Is What Happen

 I will get to doctor appointment at last paragraph, it almost one in afternoon in North Idaho. Appointment is at 4. I'm guess I'm last patient or next to last. 


So for now I'm going to challenge my self to a JOURNAL PROMPT, still going first grade ones. I'm going to take on number 10...If I was pet, I would be a kind and one that listen, and I would hope to an otter. To bring joy and laughter to others, including my self.  Otter have fun and I like to be joyfully, happy, active both physical and mental. Confession time...Still having trouble with my mental state, although slowly changing for the better. I have no ideal what I would need for care. I know as otter they like the water.  And also not sure how social they are. I could imagine two or more otter could be as fun as barrel of monkeys. 

I did finish up my version of Sagittarius in Pluto. Don't have any photo in my main camera. I will share some creative things. I haven't done much. But I got some fabric press and ready to cut. The issue if I set all that much I start to think or spend to much time in my own head. Well now I now I need to cut them into strips, 2.5 inch across and 10 inch long. Not sure when I will be getting to them. I been watch eco friendly dying paper and fabric from nature gifts. I would like to try it. 

Got my nose swap and what weird feeling. The doctor didn't think I have covid. Just possible a cold or slight irritation by the smoke. But most smoke is up in higher range. Confession time...I wouldn't went to doctor to get a test over the common cold. Liz only has one working lung. Hasn't been vaccinated, and takes no precaution for virus. Non masker. She would have a harder time on ventilator.  Didn't want to be the culprit and was the direct link that gave her it. Well good news is I don't have covid. Anyhow we're the  HOT SPOT area for Covid. We're running OUT OF BEDS. Still you see plenty of unmask people and out in community. Finely 27% of area is fully vaccinated. 

Coffee is on and stay safe


Tuesday, September 07, 2021

Today Is Tuesday September 7 2021, This Is What Happen

 Still feeling rough, with sore throat. Yesterday was labor day and most thing are back up. So I called to see if I could get covid test though my regulars doctor office. I don't need emergency treatment. Well there people that work at local hospital who refuse to get vaccinated. So I will go in tomorrow late afternoon and let them swab up my nose. Than on the 13th I see my doctor and discuss my emotional state of my up coming surgery of my son. 

Tuesday is day I talk about well being. Got chapter four done in my Overeaters Anonymous, or what I could answer at this point. I will have go back though the book. They ask some hard question. Starting to wonder if your in denial, don't recall, or never happen. Have I admitted my mistakes and knowledge others are sometimes right? Have I been teachable or complacent? "Yes" was my answer. Anyhow as I age I have more desire to learn. I wish paid more attention as I went though school. 

Also I do a well being word and I'm up letter "Q" and I'm going to use the word "Quondam" and simple way for me answer "Yes I Was This and That and No There Part Of Me Has No Desire To Have Let Say Teenage Feeling or Even Go Though It Again." I have to say my teenage years wasn't all that easy. But I got though them. Plus I could say I don't want to weigh what I did when I graduated. I would like to even be about 10 pounds heavier. 

Murphy is started to paint the trim piece to go around the windows. I can't say I been doing much for exercises. I will do little bit of walking around the place. I got some items mail. I stuck some packages out in mail box, with 20 dollar bill and ask mail carrier to send them on. A lease I feel safe leaving cash in mail box. Maybe some places I wouldn't do it. I work a little bit more on drawing of one social issue I'm passion about. Got some pillow cases line up to cut into strips. 

Coffee is on and stay safe


Monday, September 06, 2021

Today Is Monday September 6 2021, This Is What Happen


 I came down with some crud, start yesterday. Later in afternoon, start with pretty bad sore throat. I been vaccinated. But in this area still not all that many been vaccinated and or wear a mask. So I guess I wonder if it covid. Got hold of my clients and told them I have the crud. Can't deny I been under stress about my son and took tole on my immune system. 


In my current bullet journal, I have list of 25 goals I want to do, or project. One is get rid of some items. First you pick 5 out 25 and focus on them. Well one of them is to get 21 items from main floor. Got it done. Last time Murphy went dump I send him with a 12 blank fabric cardboard bolts. I know blog about that in past. 

I mention that I sometime would like to do a crochet rag rug under my dinning table. So here some odds and ends. Of mainly pillow cases. I did mange get rolled up in ball watch on P.B.S about FRANCES. PERKINS. Picked out next so called batch of pillow cases and sheets will be cut in to strips and rolled in balls.



Couple times the weather people try to give a frost scare. Nothing so far. Actual it been pretty nice weather here. The smoke from wild fires been hanging up in Mountains. I was hoping that our artichoke would of been father along. In past we had more artichoke and what we knew what to do with them. 

Even having the crud I mange to get load of laundry done. Unloaded the dishwasher, and organize some of my fabrics. Yesterday I couldn't draw a basic square, well today, like they say "Is a new day" I could draw a square, for bank vault that I'm drawing. But I think I like saying "Back To Old Drawing Board" Oh I also took trash and sweep the floor. 

Didn't want to spread the crud about in community. So Murphy went to town and get some items. I can't recall every thing we got. Toilet paper and eggs was on list. I know not many here have mask on. But in demeaning tone. I ask about local mask count. He said he thought he notice 2 people in store having there mask on. That not counting the staff. See Safeway store the employees wear their mask. Since on Covid bit. I should give you some numbers. In last seven days we had 71 cases here. Which is 27.37% positivity rate. Still are vaccinated rate still creeps up slowly. I get kick out of our state public announcements on how there no lines for vaccine. Right now we stand at 26.9% fully vaccinated. 

Start to watch HOW WE THINK over on you tube. Question time...What do you think about conspiracy theories. In all honestly I laugh at most of them. 

Coffee is on and stay safe

Sunday, September 05, 2021

Today Is Sunday September 5 2021, This Is What Happen

 Usually on Sunday I take three comments and try to expand on it. But today I will do only two, because I was ask if Bart last tumor was benign. They didn't not use term benign, but they didn't use the term Malignant. But it was explain as unusual cell and odd shape tumor. So nothing will be known until after the surgery, which is end of the month. I still feel both sad and anxious.

My first comment will be from RIVER and her blog is called "Drifting Though Life" and she wrote...I can understand you being upset about Bart. I would be to if one my children had cancer. It is hard to stay positive, so cry when you need to, but maybe not while driving. I hope he will be ok, just like the last time...I never really had to deal with any close people with cancer. My father in law had colon cancer and time he seek medical treatment it was to late. on my mom side I only knew one person who had also colon cancer, cousin of mine. So far so good. Also and Aunt and Uncle by marriage had cancer. So I don't have much experience. I don't worry about crying. It when I do it. I think it was Friday. I was heading to work and start to cry and thought it wouldn't be good ideal to show up teary eye. So I drove around to pull my self together. See both my client is mental ill and it wouldn't be good to see me in such state. I know Bart will fight for life. He has young family. He took responsibility and change his habits do to his health management. 

Now for second comment is from LIZ and her blog is called "Law of Gravity" This is a great piece. I wonder what it for....I have no ideal but Sandpoint isn't all that big either. But they have street art. I believe or I'm guessing it first stain glass statue. It look wouldn't move, anchor in place.

Liz, not one above gave me. She gave me three and hung them on a tree snag. I like more to hang about. Maybe on corner of buildings. On power line pole. I usually put mask on them. But this year I didn't.

Earlier I tried working on drawing. I couldn't get the basic of draw a 3d square. It should be simple. The end part of drawing should be a bank vault. Been keeping busy, although I know one can't keep busy 24/7. I found this SITE called Quotation page. Up in the right hand corner is search and put the word "balance" and gave me quotes about balance.

"Truly successful decision making relies on a balance between deliberate and instinctive". 

Got two package to be send off. And forgot no mail tomorrow, because of labor day. So it will go out on Monday. One of my thrift store shopping spree. I ended up with some precut fabric square and I got them put in their popular envelopes. 

It looking smoking around top of the mountain here. I asked a few to be guest blogger. And so far I got a "I will try" it not go to hell.

Coffee is on and stay safe   

Saturday, September 04, 2021

Today Is Saturday August 4 2021, This Is What Happen

 

Start to draw anther page for the sketchbook project in Brooklyn. This my version of Sagittarius going though Pluto. Something that needs to be call to attention. To me the hand holding the heart would be the hardest part of drawing. I do have hands drawn but  no photo of it. What issue do you think needs to attention called to?

This little girl, Granddaughter Wendy got on phone. And told me she was coming to the park to play with me. It brighten up my spirit. See Bart and his family along with his father in law Cyrus. They're heading up to Smith Creek and look around the CONTINENTAL MINE 

I usual don't have problems with depression and or anxiety as a whole. But this time I will fall into one or the other and struggle to find an emotional balance. Ages ago I was on LEXAPRO and ZOLOFT. But one of them I had trouble taking it gave me a constant head ache. I don't want high dosage that I can't feel emotions of any type. Which isn't all good. But I feel like I'm lacking or struggle to find any serotonin or if I get natural it gone fairly fast. Murphy was worried I would have melt down and start to cry in front of Bart, and so was I. I have no suicide or self harm ideals. But I'm going to make appoint Friday the 10th to see my doctor. For following week, to see if they might be able to help me. I mange to keep my self together at work, but it isn't easy. There been time I been time I would just bust out crying. It 

Murphy and I cut the window trim for the back windows. Notice more of leaves came off the birch by mail box. It been a while we had fired chicken heart for dinner. I'm starting to ask people both family and friends to do a blog post for me. I'm still wondering back in day how common to let other people make diary or journal entry in either one. I been on hunt for such an answer.

Coffee is on and stay safe

Friday, September 03, 2021

Today Is Friday September 3 2021, This Is What Happen

 Oh where to start. I had to take a bit of drive before went to work, didn't want to show up to work with teary eyes. So I drove around the Oxford loop, and more less what conversation between my mind and heart. Any long time goals comes to mind I begin to cry. So for now I'm keep my plan less than 30 days out. If I think much past that I start to cry. See I been putting Bart in the past tense and none of us is promise tomorrow. And I know people who live with cancer for like over 20 years, one of my cousin by marriage went though all sort of cancer for well over 20 years.  I know I have strength to get though it.  

I been debating this with my self, about having guess bloggers. I made the step and ask my sons and there wives. In near future I want to ask my friend Liz, Regis, Poet, Qunella, Lolita, and I'm sure I will come up with others. And as for what blog, it depends on what pops in my mind. I don't have many rules about blog post. If they want to give basic weather report or write lengthy post. That ok with me. 

I've glance though the BOOK and read some of passages in this book. Found out Virginia Woolf has made a entry in Vita diary. Well I want to know back in Victorian and Edwardian era if it was fairly common to make entiries in other people diary and or journals. Question time...Have you every had a guess blogger? 

I was hoping to get something creative done, so I can share it. I mange to finish up chapter 4 and 5 in my overeaters Anonymous work book, well question isn't easy. It look like I will have to go though the book several time. For what every reason part of me isn't ready or willing to deal with certain things in my life. It beautiful day clear blue sky's. 

 

Thursday, September 02, 2021

Today Is Friday September 2 2021, This Is What Happen

 Let get right to news. Talk to Bart and his insurance will be covering him and tumor removal. But I still in emotional conflict. I want and need to be honest with my self. If I start having hope and everything will work out just find. Than I get angry at my self for possible not being in reality. But when I feel discouragement. I feel guilty. So I'm not sure how or what to feel. I feel like I'm being flip between hope and discouragement. I feel safe feeling for me is indifference. If I can't settle my feeling I will seek a therapist. But a thing helps me is that I know he is strong will and do everything he needs to be their for his family. And his surgery is end of the month. 

Work went well today took Regis to his appointment and went over to Liz went though some items. She likes to watch DR PIPPLE POPPER  

Editor Note...I'm not sure what reality should or should not be. 

Coffee is on and stay safe


Wednesday, September 01, 2021

Today Is Wednesday September 1 2021 This What Happen

Wednesday is day I challenge my self to random writing prompt. I'm doing NUMBER ONE . Iknown Gloria for a long time, not going even to do the math. I meant her as she was entering Kindergarten. And she was two years old than me. Her mom was visiting a family between us and them. Who lived on Pierce in Spokane Valley. At time my parents lived on Castaldo. And my soon to be friend lived over on Johnson. So over the years we start hanging out with each other and do things. Spend the night at each other home. My mom and her also became friends. Once a month my mom and some other ladies would do a luncheon at one of the local eating establishment.  Confession time...Her and I could be handful for our parents. I'm sure they will be parts of our life left out, any how I don't want to go on and on. And I don't believe any of you want me to continue a never ending story. Gloria was youngest of three, she has one brother and one sister. For some reason we like to jump up and down in my parents pick up bed. Since she was older and had two years of experience. One day she ask me if I want to hear cuss words. thinking it a foreign language. So she said quite a few cuss words. I said "Gee my dad says those words quite often. She got married about the same time I did. Although they choose not have any children.

Balance out the money, so I can pay our bills. Gave Murphy some cash to work with. He doesn't think he will need anything. But who knows what will come up. Regis and I went to one yard sale. Neither one of us found anything. We went to both of thrift store and I got some fabric for $1.99. Not sure what Regis got. 
Than over to Liz we clean out and area, and took some items of her to the thrift store. 

Haven't been happy with way I been mental, emotionally, and attitude in so many things. So my word I use to get me though it is "Serenity" to my higher power. I have conflicting thoughts both positive and negative.

Coffee is on and stay safe

Today Is Thursday, March 28, 2024: This Is What Happened.

I have been putting together my bullet journal for the second quarter. I’m so thankful for the white-out. I almost made a calendar for the ...