Today Is Sunday September 26 2021, This Is What Happen

 Sunday is day I take three comment using a number generator to see which comments I will blog about. Last week I had total of 66 comments. There were a few days I didn't blog. Usually it seems like my Sunday post might be little long. No apology here. Last evening I got some fabric strips sewn together. So I will share the piece I got done. 

My first comment I will be using is from Betty of WOOD FAIRY the comment she left was "Glad you have seen your son and feeling positive, glad your throat is nothing life threating, looks interesting wrapping trees and prep for winter....It help lot seeing Bart. I won't say I'm not worried. But the visit is helping me deal with it. But once I start talking to the therapist and sort things out. I believe that will make difference in my life. As for trees there certain ones we try to keep the odds down for deer damage.  

Number two comment once again comes from YOGI his comment is " I hope you get help soon. I see Idaho and Oklahoma are like two worst state for covid. So we have something in common....I'm not sure the difference between emotional and mental issues. But my state of Idaho has one of highest suicide rate, we are 48% higher than the national average. I called a while back and recently see what going on with the therapist was to be line up with. So if I hear nothing by 6th of October, I will call and see what's happening. I will put a wager that also Oklahoma carried Trump. 

Number three comment and last one is from LOW CARB and here is her comment "I do hope you get appointment with your therapist soon" There not many place here that one can get help for any sort of emotional and or mental health. I know a guy who spend about three month in our local hospital looking for Psychiatrics unit in hospital ward. I'm not sure how the state mental ward works. I believe the close one is in Orofino. But what I found out that non baby boomer are less than other generation to see a therapist. Personal I have no issue of seeing one. 

It look like I was blogging about mental illness back in 2008 if I look a little harder I bet it was before that. I feel our spiritual, mental and emotional health is as important as our physical health. 

Right before I woke up this morning I had dream about "cleaning carpet"  well things were swept under the carpet in our family. Although not as many as I know. But it part of the baby boomer generation. Outside appearance was the norm. Two saying comes to mind when I think of carpet...SWEEP UNDER THE CARPET and also CALL IT ON CARPET. There issue from way back in my life has to do with both phases. Once I have understanding I will post them on my blog .Once week I lay out tarot cards and since it first weekend after Mabon (Fall equinox) I did more of intense lay out. Not going to cover it all. "Heart of Matter" I got the Magician he/she has tools to get though life. My therapist will be one of my tools to help me deal with things. "Immediate future" I got hermit and I need to look inside of me and work things out. Than the last card I want to share would be Ten of sword. Not a so called comfort card. I look at ten of swords as despair and festered. This card came under "This Is Out Come" the card was upside down and I know all 10 of swords isn't going to disappear with flick of switch.  

 Murphy took out standing portable air condition and we will by second one, before nest year heat comes around again. I wash down my western saddle and need to get some neatsfoot oil. I know tomorrow I have to take Regis to some of his appointment in Sandpoint. Plus there some other places we want to stop in. Not sure what I will happen the rest of week. It came to my mind that I haven't worked on my personal tarot cards. But I did find an SURREALIST TAROT deck. Not sure if I will get it or not. But what I'm hoping I can do my version of Pluto in Aquarius. 

Coffee is on and stay safe

Today Is Saturday September 25 2021, This Is What Happen.

 It been Wednesday sine I posted I figure some of you need break from me. Plus it pretty much same ole crap. Hope this doesn't sound like a good bye cruel world. It not. I also need break from my thoughts. 

"A people that value it's privileges about it principles will soon loose both" 

Got tote of yellow fabric done. Made swatches out of them. If my calculation is spot on it. So far I have 7 pages of yellow. I know there more to do. It look like I have 2 more tote to work with. And I will see were and what needs to be done.

Yesterday Hubby and I went down to the doctor for my throat and it nodular. It super small and he couldn't feel any liquid in it. Ask me if I was expose to radiation for any length of time. I had to say "No" and he could fill in liquid in the nodular on my thyroid. So they do anther ultra sound in six months. He said it could been there for years. 

Well after since we were so close to Spokane. Bart drove over and meant us at Q'EMILIN PARK we visit about. Sure it still bother me that he has a tumor on his brain. I won't lie. The main thing that helps me push toward hope, is that he making steps for a positive out come. I can make steps also in positive way. But I did take quarter of tranquillizer. That way I knew I wouldn't of broke down and start to cry. I'm crying less. I mean lot less. Tranquillizer has there place, but I sure have no desire to use them on a regular time frame. It ok to take break from your issues or what tangle up in your mind. But to long break doesn't take the mental infection down, it could even fester more. Than we went over to BOB SEAFOOD and BURGERS the only thing I every had there is fish and chips. Well fries. So I gave Bart a hug and told him "I Love You" and "Good Luck With Surgery" His dad give him a hug and not sure if any word were exchange. But I feel better, known I told him I love you and good luck. I feel better seeing my son. It helped. 

Last Wednesday the 23rd my oldest turn 33. He just had a vasectomy. He said he sore. So both my son I guess did gentleman thing. So look like Murphy and I will only have little girls for grandchildren. Unless one of them adopted. 

Murphy and I did some home project or cooler weather preps. The northside of shed/garage roof was loose and we use liquid nail to hold down. I'm guessing around Wednesday or so, the brick will be taken down. Everything should be set up by then.

g

Start to wrap some of our trees. Mainly from deer rubs. There head and antler get itch. There still enough around to scratch on. 

Covidiots are doing fine here in North Idaho. Don't think one get their point across by OUT YELLING THOSE WHO DON"T AGREE WITH. People like this, is reason I still wear and N95. If I didn't believe in Karama. I might even wish there big toe would fall off. I even wonder if these covidiots could even pass HIGH SCOOL SCIENCE This is my community FACTS on covid and it the vaccine.

Time to go fold clothes.

Coffee is on and stay safe pol

Today Is Wednesday September 22 2021, This Is What Happen

 Usual Yesterday I talk about my health challenge and adventures. Although at this time I just keep my self under 205. I haven't really worked on loosing or keeping to a plan that is health. I just don't have it in me to go full bore ahead. I guess one would say I'm a modified version of getting fit. I gave my self permission. I know I will get moving forward in life once again. I'm not giving up.

Than on Wednesday, which is today I try to do some writing challenges. I will be doing NUMBER 28....which is "What is the best feeling in world" Not sure if it actually a feeling or not. But I have to say "Being Understood" although express one self can be awkward it doesn't matter what age you are. Than they're time we might not even understand our self. This is why I'm trying to line up a therapist to help me sort out and or understand my feelings and such. I know we will never understand totally understand other people. Simple reason is we don't listen totally to other and even our self. Sad things there time we get to busy with our own thoughts and such. If we took a few minutes to just shut up and listen. And try to understand the world wouldn't have as many hurt feelings.

Regis neighbor Edward hasn't been around and couple package been piling up on his door steps. So Liz had his number and gave him a call and found out he came down with covid. Ended up in hospital down in Kootenai County. As far as I know he wasn't connect to a ventilator. But he does have kidney dialysis 3 times a week. His sister and him thought this entire thing was hoax. She wore a mask because her employer required it. Nothing to serious Edward would see me out in store and sort of rib me about having a mask on. Nothing nasty or cruel. This is what got me. I know a few people thought because Mark blood was being process that the virus of any sort was being clean. So he had no worry about covid. 

To best of my knowledge Bart surgery happens the 30th of this month. I been hearing some people have trouble getting there medical needs meant. But than I hear things are getting meant. So one doesn't know what to believe. I don't take much trust what coming though on facebook. But still I like more people to take this virus seriously. Bart amazing and he will do what needs to be done. 

This is last little bit of eco dying. I'm going work on my fabrics and later on read some blogs. Plus I figure my version of Pluto going though Aquarius. I liked to get start before end of the month. 

Today Is Tuesday September 21 2021, This Is What Happen

The weather been fantastic and listen to Biden speech or part of it. As he was address the U.N. 

Morning been some what struggle. This morning wasn't as bad as a lot of mornings. But still I have to push my self though my life. This morning even if the lawn had dew on it and got my shoes wet. I walked around the place and soaked in the sun. 

I got some blue strips cut for the up coming quilt. I can't tell you exactly how long I been working on it. I know it been sometime. Color blue seems fairly easy to come by. 

Quenella and I had out morning coffee and I got my self a muffin. In colder months we won't be meeting. I might go out to her place once month for a visit. She thought of meeting in car, but I wasn't into it. Like in my POST yesterday. Under the Sun as well as other business here, they don't take covid seriously. 

Quenella got a journal about grieving and she said she wasn't into journal. Confession time....I was supervise how much I like journal/blogging. I guess they might be local grieving group though Lutheran church and she planning to donated to them. I might of done a few journal pages when I was in school. But I under stand journaling start to go more after I was out of high school. When I grew up a little expression of anything mostly emotions wasn't part of my generation. We learn or was expect to suppress them. Sooner or later some kind of trigger brings them back to top.

Interesting day at work. Both my client Liz and Regis doesn't have what I would say good "Coping skills" not saying mine is top notch. But earlier Liz and her son Cyrus got into this spat. Couldn't make heads or tails of it. Anyhow I really wasn't try or even wanted to. Cyrus was on lunch and went back to work. I thought she was talking to her therapist and she came out of the back room and was staggering about and pass out. Regis and I got her up the couch, she was dead weight pretty much. Been though this before. So took Regis to the store and found out she called her social worker up. Or was it the other way. Not sure on that. But found out she took anywhere from 10 to 15 Benzodiazepines. The medics was called and of course the police comes. She semi came around and agree to let medic look her over and her vitals was in a good range. So they asked if she want to go to hospital or not. She refuse. I don't think she want to deal with the issue between Cyrus and her. So she want  to blank out as quick as possible. Honestly I'm sure she didn't want to end her life. One thing I don't understand how the doctor rights out prescription for them and knows she drinks. I know they only give small quantity. 

Here some eco printing I did on paper. Maybe before Sunday I can explain how I did eco printing.

Coffee is on and stay safe

Today Is Monday September 20 2021, This Is What Happen

 

For first time I did some eco dying of fabric. I thought I would post some photo. I consider my first round trail and error. 

I haven't heard from therapist, so I called and to find out what is going on. Well they got me on list to see this one therapist, who is new hire. He hasn't been there for month and only has a small case load, so he can get use to the paper work. So it sound like I will be seeing him in one or two weeks. And their anther therapist coming on board in October. The lady who schedule behavior health ask me if I was going harm my self and my answer was no. But I told  her the morning was the most difficult for me. I couldn't come up with word in morning how feel, tell I got off the phone. The word would be "Hallow" 

  

Just general stuff at work. Found a table on main street in Bonners Ferry. Ate my lunch and read a few pages but had trouble keeping focus. The hospital doctor wrote a LETTER TO PAPER and still people in my area thinks the plaque is a hoax. As of 17th they're is 208 active cases here. But we're a low population area. Still my community haven't made third on vaccinations. Still low amount people where mask. I had to go into grocery store. But I don't get people who wear mask around there chin. I saw two adult female walking in store, with mask down around there chin. Usual you don't see many like that. They had smug look on there face. Question time...what statement our these people trying to make? Qunella and I will be meeting for our morning coffee tomorrow. We get our coffee and treat at Under The Sun, head out to and outdoor table. Once the weather start to cool down. We won't be meeting weekly. Usual the majority at under the sun aren't masked and no plexiglass. So we will discuss cooler weather plans. Until the snow flies we could possible meet once month at each other places. Qunella and I been both vaccinated.

Coffee is on and stay safe   

Today Is Sunday September 19 2021, This Is What Happen

 Sunday is usually the day I take three comments and expand on them. My first one or lucky one came from Australia. It seem I connect with lot of "Ozzy" So RIVER wrote this...I think your mind will be much easier when Bart operation is over. My mum would of been 96 now if she lived. In all honesty I want Bart operation to be over. But I know lot people are praying and sending positive love, strength, and energy. I do apparated this very much. Sawyer Bart brother who two and half years older. In his simple words of "Bart will be ok" The first time around Bart had tumor remove it didn't seem to bother me as much. But the second one is. Although I keep push forward. Lot of people in my family lived into there 90's I now have two Aunts who are in their 90's.   

Liz over at LAW OF GRAVITY wrote this  comment on my blog....When my mind is racing. I have drops that helps me chill me out a little. Sometime you need a little help to get back to calm. Definitely see Bart. I have left my car lights on a couple of times. Not fun the dead battery.....My mind seem to be more balance. Or my depression and or anxiety don't last as long. But there still time I do have my episodes. The Lexapro is keeping the depression or anxiety to more manageable level so I can function. Not having car does bring problems

My last comment I will be sharing is from YOGI...I have some distant relatives living in Bonners Ferry. I guess they like it as they been there for a long time....In the 20's and 30's quite few people left dust bowl area of country and came up here. And now people who retire with there big pension on coast is coming here now. But it doesn't help the people who was foolish enough to stay here and try to make living. Most people I know who stayed in area and work lot of there retirement is under 1,200 a month. But those who moved in from other place there retirement is over 1,200 month. But not many came claim to be born in Bonners Ferry. If Yogi distant relative been here I might know the family.

Got some fabic press and during the week I hope to put it in they're correct container. I will start green on left, only one piece. Than continue though until yellow. At very end. I don't think this week I will get any sewing done on 2 inch block quilt. I been working on. But following week they're a good chance I will do some stitching. I try my hand at eco dying fabric and paper. The first round went ok. But there still a learning curve. I will be glad to show the eco dying after it dried. Work this week. I think the only place I have someone for appointment is Regis at physical theory and cognitive. Than my self to a throat doctor on Friday down in Postfall I have some type of nodular on my thyroid. They will be looking at. Planning to meet Bart and his gang in Courd'Alene area.  Oh and in morning which is Monday I will call the lady at KANISKU and try to get hold of person who head of behavior health. . And see what going on. I never got called last week, like I thought I would. 

Going to watch PBS Ken Burn MUHAMMED ALI. MY father didn't care for him. My father had quite a few prejudice. Change was difficult for him. As I understand lot of changes happen in his life wasn't necessary for the best. I wish I could remember the quote he use for Muhammed Ali. But before my dad pass away his heart soft for negros.

Coffee is on and stay safe

Today Is Saturday September 18 2021, This Is What Happen

 Morning isn't as rough for me. But I wonder when I will either drop into depressive or anxiety stage. I know none of you can really do anything about it. I know I will get though it. Still planning to see a therapist, but finding one can be frustrating. But I'm willing to go down to Sandpoint to see one. I only know of 2 places in my community offers counseling and there well over 30 down in Sandpoint. 

I like to take a paragraph space and tell you about the black market. When I mention black market in YESTERDAY post, I'm not talking about meeting someone in back ally, with pass words and such. Most people I've taking care of got under $900 monthly and majority of them actual receives $771 month as a single person or for couple $1,191. I never took care of couple, which both was on disability.  So quite a few when they go to doctor and they exaggerate their condition. So in hope the doctor will write out prescription for more than they need or stronger dose. So usually they sale up to third of there pills. And extra $20 or so for these people comes in handy. I've mention it to other profession that is connected with the selling of part of medication. And they also turn a blind eye. Like I said an extra $20 makes the different if they will eat last few days of the month.  

Couldn't tell you how long I been working on my sketch book project for BROOKLYN ART LIBRARY. This is how I see generational planted of Pluto going though Capricorn. At this time Capricorn is going though Pluto, it came in November of 2008 and will leave in January 2024. Less than 6 months. Also during the American Revolution was Pluto was going though Capricorn. In nut shell Pluto going though Capricorn is about "Building a Better World" You may think of these words to describe this planet line up. Overhaul, Heavy, Forceful, Purposeful, and Freeing. These people were born as Capricorn going though Pluto. SAMANTHA POWERS, JANE AUSTEN, ANN RADCLIFF Some comes easy for me. I know what going to do for Pluto going though Aquarius. Not clue what I will be doing as Pieces going though Pluto. I should be here as Aquarius. I should see the first part of Pieces in Pluto, and I will be in my 80's

I've never been much interesting in mind of like serial killers. But I do have interested in mind of artist. The mean behind art. I can look at art for long period of time. Trying to figure what the art piece means.

We harvest most of garden, most we gave to the neighbors. They have 6 mouths to feed. Look like it might rain all weekend. 

Coffee is on and stay safe